Friday night I had a dream that I went to the store to buy fresh parsley for someone. I got this stuff with leaves as big as elephant ears, but when I went to check out, I discovered that it was way expensive, so I didn't buy it. Then I got some normal parsley and chopped it up and put it into a bag. When I went to pay for it, there was a bunch of purpley-red stuff in the bag too, which looked like chopped red leaves. I had no idea how that had gotten there. I separated red from green and proceded to the checkout counter. Then I discovered that I had picked up one black child-size shoe and had brought it to the cash register with me. So I had to put that away before I could buy any parsley. All the while, my family was waiting for me, and I was going to be late to go somewhere.
Jeff thought this was a funny dream, but I wasn't laughing. This dream was an expression of my anxieties which are caused by life being unpredictable, messy, and out of my control. In the dream, it was all on me to make things work, and, in spite of my best efforts, things went haywire. Honestly, it feels like my waking hours are like that too. Why don't I rest in the Lord and trust Him to lead me through life's messiness? I think that I have to make every little thing go well or else I'm a bad person and I'm going to make everybody mad. Pretty irrational.
The truth is that as a Christian, I have been given the gift of righteousness, and nothing I do will make me a good or bad person. Also, God allows bumps in the road of life to give each of us opportunities to trust Him to bring us through it all. This walk of faith is what pleases Him and brings praise, glory, and honor when we get to heaven.
Jesus showed me that when I feel under pressure to do everything quickly and perfectly, He is right at my side helping me. And He's not angry, impatient, or demanding. He's patient and totally happy to be with me. How encouraging.
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